We already know that fences can be a tricky territory even for the friendliest neighbors. But as soon as the fence has expired, they are by no means clear. What happens if you want to stain or paint your page – not to mention that concerns about maintenance, splintering or annoying invasive shrubs start with your limbs? If you break out in a cold sweat that thinks of all these suburban puzzles, you can be sure that you are not the only one.
If you find out whether you should talk to your neighbor or simply take the matters yourself, it is worth considering before you get from the chat of the neighborhood group (Yikes – message), which are quickly from the neighborhood group chat. Diane Gottsman, national etiquette expert and founder of the protocol school in Texas, shares her best tips and snack bars so that they can navigate these difficult property concerns with grace and a small southern charm.
Is it rude to paint your side of your neighbor's fence?
Although there are many factors into account, it is always best to consult your neighbors before working on a fence together. “They say good fences make good neighbors, and this is the perfect example,” says Gottsman. While you may believe that your side of the fence is not smarter, an apparently simple stain or painting at your end could bleed in your side, damage the natural wood or influence the lifespan of the fence, Gottsman warns. “Painting without permission is definitely considered rude neighboring behavior.” A simple conversation can keep your relationship and at the same time make sure that you can tackle the job with a clear conscience – and maybe fewer look over your shoulder.
Is possession of the fence important?
Anyone who has paid for the fence plays a role – but that should never replace their good manners. Although they could (technically) be clear if they both own the fence and only plan to paint their side of it, it does not mean that it is the right tactic. “The best scenario is to ask your neighbors whether it is a matter of something and your answer is considered a good neighboring behavior,” advises Gottsman. Apart from that, it would not only be against a protocol not to speak to your neighbor before painting a fence you have installed, but it could also be perceived as rude.
Before you start the conversation, the etiquette expert suggests doing your homework. Contact your local laws and HOA guidelines. Not only can you make sure that you proposed fence update is not a silent problem (e.g. if your HOA only allows natural stains to color), but can also help to start talking to your neighbor. If you judge your I -i's and cross your TS before approaching your neighbors, you can assure him that you will not go into the process by chance. Also be ready to share whether you do the work yourself or set a professional, the schedule and other relevant information.
The best way to talk to your neighbor about fence problems
As with many social dilemma, it is often the most difficult to start the conversation. Gottsman recommends approaching the discussion with honesty. “You could indicate the reason and say that the fence needs some TLC and you want to improve the look of your garden by creating some updates,” she says. “Communication is the key to problems, whether structurally, as it leans on one way or another, or general maintenance.” While proper communication can keep your relationship with your neighbor, this can also indicate the sound for future projects that you may want to cope with for your property. As Southern States always say, friendliness gives friendliness.